Sarcastic Journalist - What to accept when you're expecting:

Sarcastic Journalist - What to accept when you’re expecting:

It seems like everyone loves to ask a pregnant woman if she has any weird food cravings. I really think they want you to tell them “Why, yes. I do. I eat a can of sardines every night before I go to bed. Sometimes I cover them with grape jelly.”

Really, I went for “comfort food” (cheeseburgers are comfort food in my book) and sweets. I think I personally kept Betty Crocker in business during both of my pregnancies.

It always started out innocent enough: I wanted a cookie. Next thing I knew, I had gone through an entire bag of Oreos and a gallon of milk. Then two candy bars and a sandwich.

When I first got pregnant (this was during my first pregnancy, when I read those books) I read the “What to eat” chapter in What to Expect When You’re Expecting.

These people had what I should or should not be eating down to an exact science. I wanted to get my pregnancy off to a good start, so I’d eat all that “good for you” food while really wanting to high tail it down to the corner store to pick up a cupcake.

I’d pat myself on the back, all high and mighty like, because I made myself delicious meals that would make my baby smart! Those greens? They’re getting my baby into Harvard! All that fruit? She’ll be President!

It didn’t take too many lunches of trying to eat cottage cheese before I gave it all up. I tried. I really wanted to be a good Mom and somehow, that book had me convinced that I wasn’t a good Mom because I chose chocolate over cheese. She’d be lucky if she’d get into community college with the way I was eating!

Get over it. You’ll be a good Mom. Just consider all the eating good practice for when you have a kid and you’re so tired of all the whining that yes, you let him have ice cream for breakfast.